


Just Get Me a Damned Book!

by BlackMajjicDuchess



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, Humor, Jail, Tales of a Gutsy Ninja, incarceration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-14
Updated: 2014-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-12 09:37:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1184689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackMajjicDuchess/pseuds/BlackMajjicDuchess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karin is imprisoned in Konoha during the Great Ninja War, bored out of her godforsaken mind. Oneshot. Ramblings of an inspired mind during the wee hours of the morning. Enjoy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Get Me a Damned Book!

**Author's Note:**

> This was previously posted on fanfiction.net under the same pen name December 2012
> 
> What is this about? This takes place somewhere between when Karin is brought to the Leaf Village for interrogation and now (where we don't really have much information as to what she's up to/thinking, etc.) It's just kind of a slopped together little story about her chilling in her jail cell in Konoha. No big deal. :P
> 
> Why did I write this? A couple of reasons. 1) I wanted to write about someone I hadn't written about before. Scrolled through the list and settled on Karin. 2) I am curious about what she's up to right now. The last we saw of her she'd had a rather major change of heart regarding her feelings, and then the plotline kind of forgot about her because it's up to other things. and finally, more importantly, So, here I sit, babbling about Karin at 3:30 in the morning to try to get you readers to drop in on Neji's internal strife and comment on it to make him feel like a worthwhile character. It's not easy being a Branch family member, you know. Throw the dog a mother fucking bone, here.
> 
>  
> 
> What's going on with this one then? This is a oneshot. I whipped it up in the wee  
> hours of the morning for shits and giggles. Love it or hate it. I don't really care. :D I just wanted it out of my head and chilling on my profile. No sequels are planned, nor extra chapters.

You know, jail isn't so bad.

You would think I would think the opposite. I've been the jailer of one of the most dangerous prisons in the entire world. Freakishly strong and strange ninjas were kept there. It was my job to hold them there for whatever Orochimaru wanted them for. Of course, I knew what he used them for… I just didn't dwell on it. He was the boss, and he did what he pleased.

I'm a survivor. A true, honest to goodness fucking survivor. I abandoned my friends and family to their fate when my village was attacked as a child. I didn't bat an eyelash. They didn't want to believe me when I said someone was coming and we were all going to die, so whatever. I didn't want to die, and I ran. I lived and they didn't, and I find solace knowing that if I had stayed, I'd be dead, too. I take it as a gift. I'm alive now because I trusted my instincts.

And for the time being, my instincts danced my little toesies into a prison cell in Konoha. But hey! No worries. No one ought to worry about little ol' me. As I said, jail isn't so bad. They actually feed me quite well. I have not gotten the pork that I specifically asked for, but they have given me some decent dumplings and nearly unlimited noodles, so eh. It's also quite warm in here, and although the guards are putting up a tough front, they can't disguise the fact that they are all good, pure and honest folks who won't hurt me. Their chakras are so evident that I feel like I'm swaddled in love, even if it's not exactly directed at me.

It's really strange… for the past several years I thought myself devoted to Sasuke and Orochimaru. Not exactly everyone's favorite people, I'll admit, but I saw what I thought were their intentions and was impressed by their brimming chakras, Sasuke especially. Plus, he's totally hot and I wanted to jump his bones like no one's business. When Sasuke showed up and was all "Hey I killed the boss… come with me if you want to live," I was all "I'm there!" But then, the Sasuke I remembered had dispatched yet not killed hundreds, if not thousands, of targets that Orochimaru had specifically asked him to kill. He showed mercy, for no apparent reason. I saw what others had not: that Sasuke had a soft side that he was desperately trying to hide. I guessed at the reason: that Sasuke was here to learn, and he was having none of the bullshit. I loved him, pure and simple. Bad boy with a soft spot? Chyeah!

I remember the day I decided to leave the team he'd put together. It's one of those days that you just don't forget. It's hard to forget the first time someone you love betrays you and tries to have you killed.  
First he stabs me to get the bad guy (or good guy? Who the fuck even knows anymore?), then he orders some chick I've never met to kill me to prove her worth. Whatever! As if I had not already saved his life like a hundred times over? Maybe that's an exaggeration, but still!

The girl he ordered to kill me saved my life. That's not something I am ever likely to forget, either. She was a stranger from an enemy land, asked by the man she clearly loves to kill someone she had never met to prove her feelings for him. It was an easy enough task. I was already half dead from blood loss by the time she reached me. Not only did she not kill me, she healed me! What reason did she have to do that? If I were still working for Orochimaru or Sasuke, I'm sure they'd tell me that her healing me was a clear sign of her weakness. Who heals their enemy? It meant I could fight her someday, perhaps win and kill her. If I were still with them, I'd agree, because that was what I always did. I believed in them, and I took them at their word. I mean, who the hell was I anyway? They were superninjas, powerful and confident. I was... well, me.

Instead, something changed that day she healed me. And because I had joined Sasuke's team as a free agent, I left by the same route. Left to my own devices, my brain cooked up some other motive for Sakura's intervention. I think it's because Sakura is a good person with a big heart who doesn't kill unless she sees no other alternative. I think she's more accustomed to saving people than killing them. What she saw when she met me was a stranger that needed her help to survive. She gave me the chance to prove myself. If I gave her a reason to need me dead, she'd be happy to oblige, but until then I was her patient, not her enemy.

I did mention I was a survivor. The choice was an easy one. On the one hand, my former teammate who I thought might one day come to love me tried to have me killed. On the other hand, the woman he ordered to kill me decided she'd rather let me live, even though she didn't know if I was worth saving. Consider me officially a traitor. A really good one.

And now, I'm in a nice comfy cell in the middle of the greatest ninja village, well fed and halfheartedly toyed with by guards and interrogators trying to pry intel out of me. They can't even disguise the fact that they're too distracted by the war to bother with me. The only one who really even tries is the scarred one, Ibiki. He thinks he can get something useful out of me. It's kind of like being in a nice hotel on someone else's dime with your most annoying friends always asking you questions about your ex boyfriend.

This or die a horrible painful death? Hm. Alright.

At one point I asked one of the guards (he has a crush on me) for some pen and paper. I had a letter to write. On the paper I wrote:

Sakura-

Thanks for healing me. I will tell you everything, but only you. I hope you understand. Good luck out there. Can't wait to hang out!

-Karin

I asked the guard to see that she got it when she had time. Of course, Ibiki had to read it and inspect it for traps before he would let it be delivered. I watched him read it, his expression solemn and humorless as ever. I winked at him and blew him a kiss, and he scowled. That was our relationship in a nutshell.

One thing to be said about jail: it sure was boring in here. No games, no one that interesting to talk to, no hot men to rattle. Just me and my thoughts, and currently my thoughts weren't very comforting. I flip flopped back and forth between trying to incinerate all my feelings for Sasuke to demonize him so that I forgot how much I ever loved him, and feeling a scintilla of hope for my future here with the Leaf Village. I fantasized incessantly about them letting me stay and be a part of their little club. It was kind of nice. The people were kind and the food was good. Not a bad gig.

I actually got so bored that I requested books. I don't even like reading! I just figured a little bit of information couldn't be a bad thing. I told the dorky looking ninja that thought he loved me about my strange request. He, of course, had to pass it on to Ibiki. Ibiki's initial reaction was to be suspicious about why.

"I'm bored! Cripes you're obnoxious!" I sniped at him. "Give a girl something to do. I'm probably going to be here for a while what with a WORLD WAR happening outside these walls. I don't even care what you bring, just… something!" I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest and scowling.

He took too long to bring them, so I started singing. I love music, but I can't sing for shit. Everything leaves my lips out of tune. I can't fix it. On the other hand, threatening people with my voice is a flawless plan of action. It's either avoid me or give me what I want. They couldn't leave their prisoner unattended. That would be stupid. Finally, a mere day and a half into my debut as a rockstar, Ibiki thrust a paper wrapped package into my arms. I couldn't help it; I squealed like a child on her birthday and tore the paper apart with glee. The cover was rather plain, but the letters stood out clearly.

Tales of a Gutsy Ninja.

I grinned like an idiot from ear to ear, turning the book over and over in my hands. The author page showed a white haired man with red facial markings. I recognized his description as the ninja known as Jiraiya. He was also known as the Toad Sage, the legendary sannin, and one of Orochimaru's former teammates. I knew he wrote books, but had never heard of this one. I had thought he was a smut writer. All the men I'd ever known kept a copy of at least one of his books hidden somewhere that they hoped no one ever found it. Even Orochimaru had an Icha Icha book. I'd actually peeked at it a time or two. They're fun. Like, for serious.

This didn't look anything like Icha Icha. Interesting. I opened to page one and began reading, only to be immediately interrupted by Ibiki. "That was actually his first book. It's been rereleased since his death. There's not a signed copy in existence because it was such a failure when it was released the first time."

"Can it, Scarface," I yelled without even turning my head to face him. "I'm reading. You're dismissed." I waved my hand absently, for all the world like a queen with retainers.

I must have read that book cover to cover a thousand times or more in that prison cell. I figured out easily enough that Naruto, the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki, had been named after the protagonist. It's going to sound cheesy as hell, especially coming from me, but being cooped up in that cell with nothing but Tales of a Gutsy Ninja for as long as I was considered a prisoner in Konoha literally changed my life. 

I'm a fucking survivor. And I never give up.

THE END

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